I suppose it all happens as it is supposed to with total disregard for our own wishes and/or needs. There is a saying that God laughs as you make plans. I am learning slowly (and you'd think 66 years would be enough time for the lesson) to just quietly accept what is. Learning to find joy in spite of all the problems on this planet is a bigger lesson. I can feel compassion without having to deny my own happiness. I think I am beginning to get it.
Michael, my male model did not arrive here yesterday. He became very ill mid week and had to go to emergency. He has pulmonary embolism, a very serious, potentially deadly condition. Is the universe in the way? No. Life just is like this sometimes. Dear Michael, I send a big hug and hope for your return to health very quickly, not for my sake but for your own.
But perhaps I am being shown that another direction is required for my work. That is ok too if I can figure out what it is. I will continue with these two small florals and move on. Winter is coming to a close and we are having a few brighter days now at last. Feeling brighter in my heart too.